Good men are hard to find! All men are dogs! All the good black ones are taken! Black women are mean! Black women think they don’t need a man! Black women aren’t supportive! Good women are too high maintenance.
If you’ve heard one of these lines, you’ve heard them all. The truth is…. None of them are true. All men are not dogs, a good man is quite easy to find and there are plenty of good black men available. Black women need men just like every other race of women. Black women are not mean. Black women support their men more than most. A weave and a mani/pedi are not high maintenance. So why are there so many black men and women, who desire strong and loving relationships, single as the penny in my pocketbook?
Black men and women are single because they don’t know how to love one another.
Let’s start with the black man. Just because you have a job and the desire to be someone’s husband doesn’t make you a good man for every woman. Black men have the tendency to start feeling themselves once they get a little bit of responsibility. Buying bottles, slangin wang and netflix and chilling don’t make you a good man for every woman. Getting a degree, paying bills on time and driving a Benz doesn’t make you a good man for every woman. Men, especially black men, need to understand that being a man doesn’t make you a good man and being a good man does not make you a good partner. Think about why you want a wife and whether or not you’re truly ready. Then find a woman that compliments you rather than imagining what you THINK you deserve and being disappointed when you don’t get it. Stop overlooking good women for the easy ones. When you and your rib are reunited everything hard will be bearable.
Now ladies, don’t think I forgot about you all. There is a major difference between being an independent and confident woman and being a bitch in heels. You cannot continue to emasculate these men and expect them to be the kings they are designed to be. A man that allows you to walk around with his manhood in the palm of your hand is a manchild that needs to continue to grow. How can you expect to be in a healthy relationship when you’re posting titty Tuesday and back shots on IG and acting like there’s nothing wrong with it? As women, you have to learn to grieve losses and move on because if you keep treating the next man like the last man; he too will leave you with a broken heart and a wet ass. Stop being thirsty to find your dream man and appreciate the man who cares enough to find out what your dreams are.
What’s wrong with black men and women today is that they think they are entitled to something spectacular just because they desire it. If you’re not living a life that is a representation of what you want then you’re living wrong. You can’t be a McDonald’s negro looking for a Ruth’s Chris woman. You can’t be a Victoria’s Secret chick with a La Perla attitude.
Long story short, understanding that there is someone for everyone is important. I’ve seen some crackhead marriages stand the test of time because they dated someone they were equally yoked with. So please, before you start talking about you’re single because of the flaws within the opposite sex; look at your reality and see if you’re attracting what you deserve. If you’re attracting the same man/woman with a different face, then maybe you’re looking at a reflection of yourself.